I had all intentions of working on my new song today, finalizing the music and then recording the vocals…but that did not happen. Instead I *finally* made the valances to hang in the living room (that only took 6 months) and took the dog for a walk. Do you think I’m avoiding my song? I do. Crazy! I want to get this recorded so I can share it but I guess that’s the scariest part – sharing it. I told my mother about it today on the phone and she’s looking forward to hearing it. I have until Friday to get it done (date I committed to my Coach) so it’s not like I’m waiting until the last minute, but I’m afraid that’s just what I’ll end up doing.
Ok, it’s off to the showers and then to bed. ttfn 🙂
Well today’s session really opened things up for me. I recognized just how much I’ve been stiffling myself when it comes to knowing what my passions are. Singing and songwriting are what really gets me fired up but I’ve been suppressing it because the ‘logical’ side of my brain has been in control. That little voice keeps saying things like: you’re too old, you’ll look silly, people will laugh at you, you’re not good enough…and the list just goes on and on. We talked about how unhappy I am by not following my passion and determined that I’ve got to reel in the logical side of my brain. It’s really been having way too much control over how I live my life. So now that we’ve determined what my passion is and what’s holding me back, we need to create a plan to overcome it and move forward. That’s my homework from this session. We meet again in two weeks and I hope to have my mission statement finalized and maybe even a song or two completed – hey, a girl can dream! ttfn
Although I am still a little skeptical, I had my first meeting with a life coach yesterday. He seems very engaged and willing to help so I should stop my negativity and try to jump in with both feet. His name is Bob and he seems to have ‘heard’ it all before – I mean that in a good way; my problems are not unique and he’s worked with others stuck in the same place. He said we would start out by crafting a mission statement – now these things always make me feel like I’m treating my life like a business so I get a little turned off but he asked me to play along so I will. He started asking questions about identifying 3 things I’m passionate about – ok that’s my problem! That’s why I’ve enlisted his help – I can’t figure out what my passions are…but I played along and I was able to name a few things I ‘think’ I’m passionate about. Then he asked me to name 3 defining moments in my life – wow this is getting really deep now. Then he asked me to name 3 defining moments in my career – some of those were overlapping with the first. And lastly he asked if I had only 6 months to live what would I do with that time. Ok, I’m officially exhausted at this point but I have to admit I had a few revelations during these exercises. I guess I do know what my passions are I’m just afraid to go after them. He assigned me homework – get a journal and write all the reasons I can’t do what I want…that’s right, every thing that ‘little voice’ in my head tells me about why I can’t do something – write it down. This should be easy 🙂
Ok, so the first meeting went pretty well and I’m looking forward to our next meeting. I’m just so tired of ‘wishing’ I could do something else but never moving from the spot I’m in…as the old saying goes ‘etiher shit or get off the pot’. Hopefully Bob will help me ‘get off the pot’!! ttfn
I’ve been really bad these last two weeks, not keeping up with this blog. I do have a lot to say but I’m just not making the effort to put up posts…why, why, why do I do this to myself??
I interviewed a life coach and I’m a bit intimidated by the price tag but I think it’s just what I need. Someone who will help me figure out what I want to do and then hold me accountable to doing it. I called his references and of course they speak highly of him so I guess I could at least try out 1 or 2 sessions and if I’m not happy I can just walk away (I’m good at that!).
On another subject; we went out singing karaoke last night and I had a blast. It was a small crowd but very appreciative of our songs and voices. In fact I think I over did it because my voice is a little raspy today. I could get used to going there, the atmosphere was great and the karaoke system was pretty good too.
That’s about all I’ve got for now…I’ll try to do better posting every day.
So I got a new phone last week, Droid Pro from Verizon. I really like it so far but I’m still getting used to it. One of the first things I did was download the WordPress app so I could blog on the go…but the damn thing doesn’t work, wtf! I made a post and saved it but it never updated to the web. I can view the post using the app but it’s not here when I logon to the website. I guess I’ll post a question to the tech geeks one of these days…until then I’ll just use the app to view posts and comments.
A follow up on my last post regarding Life Coaches; I had a face-to-face meeting with the coach I found online. He seems pretty nice, very upbeat and he’s sure he can help me. Isn’t that his job though -convince me he can help -but there’s no gaurantee. And at $175/hour I think I need more than just his opinion. I asked for references and he gave me two, I’ll give them a call this week but I don’t expect to hear anything but good comments. I’ll have to try to read between the lines if there’s anything to find.
That’s about all for now…ttfn
***Update: I figured out why I couldn’t see the posts from my phone on the web…I had saved it as a Draft – duh!!!!***
I found a coaching service close to me by searching on the internet yesterday. I took the leap of sending them an email so they could contact me to talk about what I needed. This is the scary part for me; I don’t open up easily whether its to strangers or close friends. I hate being seen as vulnerable because I’m afraid I’ll be taken advantage of. They responded very quickly and said they will call me tomorrow morning. I guess I better get ready to tell them what I’m looking for and ask how much it will cost to get their help.
So what am I looking for in a life coach? I need someone to be accountable to – someone who will tell me they are counting on me to do the things that I want to do. You see I have no problem doing things that other folks ask me to do but when it comes to doing the things that I would like to do, or at least try to do, I always let them fall by the wayside. I know what I’m doing and yet I can’t stop doing it!! grrrr!! So can I expect a life coach to do that for me? I guess I’ll find out tomorrow. I hope it’s not too expensive, if it is then I will probably not do it. I have this other issue of not spending money on things that I want/need. I can always rationalize why it’s not really necessary – sometimes I’m my own worst enemy. Oh well, I’ll post tomorrow with an update. ttfn